Stroke City

I'M GOING TO PUKE!!!!!

noreply@blogger.com (Whiskey Johnson) — Wed, 20 Aug 2008 08:20:00 +0000

you fucking dick, redfield. i will fuck you up. i am drunk. why is this computer in front of me?

fuck you! i am going to throw up! i hate you. fucking tab key. fuck yeah. justin, allllllllllllllll right. fuck yeah. too many bars tonight, folks. eat some poofs. it will help your tummy, says Ann. i feel like shit. Amanda...Ann is makin a move on jooj! panick! gross. i sure hope ryan fixes this. sorry, our regular readers; i am seriously drunk and can not make a proper post tonight.

some crazy homeless guy offered me psychadelics tonight. i didnt take them, but i am still fucked up. thanks ann and sameer and neelav. fuck everyone else (especially cheesey poofs. we love the gals at the Bean Bag cafe. Girl number one, you were lovely! and girl number two, you were super cute too! this has been an awesome trip, everyone! sleep tight! thanks to all the bartender ladies who put up with us. night baby darlins! thanks to Britany, Blake, Burch, Justin, Redfield, Ann, Jason, Sameer, Neelav, Carley, Alison, Redfield, and myself. Night MJ and Amanda. this shit is crazy...night Caitlin! *kissie* Night everyone! Happy San Fran day! sorry this post is so shitty.

I feel sick.

(gonna throw up)

Night folks!

=WJ=

My Stomach Ulcer Is Burning.

noreply@blogger.com (Whiskey Johnson) — Tue, 19 Aug 2008 07:05:00 +0000

So I'm sitting here in a friend's San Francisco studio reading Malcolm Gladwell's The Tipping Point and sipping on a mugful of hot chocolate and peppermint schnapps (as Redfield probably already told you). It's relaxing, and I'm surprised. For the past few months, during both the end of my college undergraduate career and the half-a-summer that followed, I've been swimming in a...oh, nevermind. I might get to this later. But basically, I'm here with Jooj from MotA and our mutual friend, Redfield. We're cruisin round San Fran for a week and visiting our friends Ann, Sameer, and (hopefully) MotA's own The Punz. And this trip has been just what I needed.

This whole venture has been wicked haphazard, but we've ran into a ton of cool stuff because of it. I'll let Redfield catch you up on all the craziness we've come across. Hopefully we'll be able to think up some great comic ideas for this trip as well. Talk to you crazy Stroke City visitors soon!

-(The oddly happy)Whiskey Johnson

There Are So Many Nor Cal Beers...

noreply@blogger.com (Redfield) — Tue, 19 Aug 2008 06:57:00 +0000

Dude! Whisky Johnson and I have had a crazy (and rough) couple days on our road trip. Tonight we hit up three bars (after sake bombs at dinner) at the lower Haight and now we're spending the night at our good friends Ann's house. : D

WJ is about ready to charge a hot chocolate w/ peppermint schnapps before bed while I'm considering a good ol' whiskey and coke. Walking around down town in San Fransicso has provided good times. I'll try to hand off the computer to Whiskey after this...hopefully he'll post his impressions.

- Redfield

Road Trip

noreply@blogger.com (Redfield) — Sat, 16 Aug 2008 00:33:00 +0000

I just moved into my new place in downtown San Diego. The move has been a harrowing task but I think I see the light at the end of the tunnel. Oh wait, that's a train. AAAAHHHHH!!!

Justin, Whiskey Johnson, and I will be traveling up the coast of California for a good ol' fashioned road trip starting this Saturday. Last night the three of us discussed a tentative itinerary over some whiskey-and-cokes just to get our barrings. To hear WJ talk about it, this might be the most terrifying and horrendous trip ever inflicted upon mortal boys...

Wish us luck! : D

- Redfield

P.S. If possible, I'll try to take and post pictures along the way.

City Streets

noreply@blogger.com (Redfield) — Sun, 20 Jul 2008 18:24:00 +0000

I saw Batman: The Dark Night for the second time last night. This time MJ and I went together and she loved it, too. As we were standing in line before the movie started I was looking at all of the movie posters lining the theater walls and started a mental tally of all the films I want to see. I've come to the conclusion that I either have to get some more cash-flow or resign myself to living in a cardboard box. I hear the city streets are nice this time of year...

The original intention of this post was to see if our server-transfer had gone smoothly. Again, we are working hard behind the scenes to ensure that your city visits are as enjoyable as possible. : )

The Dark Knight

noreply@blogger.com (Whiskey Johnson) — Fri, 18 Jul 2008 10:45:00 +0000

ShitballsYES!!!!!! Totally awesome! Blew my mind.

Action. Excitement. Suspense. Surprises. Even some questions to ponder on the nature of humanity.

Too much for words. Just see and enjoy.

=WJ=

Third Time's The Charm

noreply@blogger.com (Redfield) — Thu, 17 Jul 2008 22:17:00 +0000

By the way, this is the THIRD time that comic has, in some form, graced our website. Horray for recycling jokes! : P

Comic for Thursday July 17th, 2008

noreply@blogger.com (Redfield) — Thu, 17 Jul 2008 21:59:00 +0000

= Comic for Thursday July 17th, 2008 =

Two comics in one week? I think Whiskey J might be emerging from of his post-graduation doldrums. The sun is warm, the air is sweet, and we have a new comic to present you kind citizens. Things are looking up!

As for me, I have a few bucks in my pocket and Batman: The Dark Knight to look forward to tonight. All I have to do is make it through econometrics 120C and I should be good. :)

Hello Folks

noreply@blogger.com (Whiskey Johnson) — Tue, 15 Jul 2008 19:07:00 +0000

Hello out there, StrokeCity residents. I'm just here to test out some new features that Redfield has been installing. Even if you hate the site or don't even know about the site and have yet to discover and develop your hatred for it, you have to give Redfield credit for his hard work, continuing optimism, and the ability to pull through even in tough times.

As you may have realized, Stroke City has been going through a lot of re-development. Maybe you haven't noticed because it's mostly behind the scenes, but we have a few "down-town renovations" in progress as I type (this newly streamlined blogging system being one of them).

As City officials, Redfield and I are not here to make crazy promises in an effort to goad you into getting your hopes up. That is not our job. That is not what we do.

That being said, we PROMISE you great things! Crazy, magical, insane things! And your city will deliver! Otherwise, may the citizens speak their minds through their voting at the next election!*

Until next update,

Whiskey Johnson
(Your humble city official)

*the City uses an electoral college system, not a popular vote. Also, most elections take place in the form of a drinking contest.

Comic for Friday July 11th, 2008

noreply@blogger.com (Redfield) — Sat, 12 Jul 2008 06:17:00 +0000

= Comic for Friday July 11th, 2008 =

Our first comic of 2008! At least 2008's comic book will be easy to compile, eh?

Also, so you folks don't worry too much on the state of Whiskey Johnson, he hasn't really changed all that much. Sure, he's got himself a job now and pays his bills on time but at heart he's the same ol' WJ. Hell, just last night at my place I saw him wash his meat lover's pizza down with a few shots of Yukon Jack.

If you'd like to see Stroke City's comic drought come to an end I'd suggest emailing Whiskey. He responds especially well to dark-haired indie girls.

...just sayin'.

Caught With My Pants Down

noreply@blogger.com (Redfield) — Mon, 16 Jun 2008 04:52:00 +0000

My neighbor has been having a problem recently with his house dailing 911. Since he doesn't even have a land-line and since the phone calls typically happen when he's not home, I guess some phantom phone is freaking out the system. Whatever. Just hold onto this fact in the back of your mind as it'll be important in to the story I'm about to tell you.

A few Fridays ago my roommate had a big going-away party for her friend at our house. I have to work early every Saturday morning so a Friday night drink session wasn't in the stars for me (even though I was coerced into drinking a "Tweekin' Puerto Rican" - one shot of 151 dunked into, and chugged with, a Monster energy drink.) I was chillin' on the couch with some friends late in the evening, finishing a home brew of mine, when I had to go to the bathroom. When I tried to enter into our only bathroom I found the door to be blocked by a young ladies leg. Turns out that the girl-of-honor had a few too many Tweekin' Puerto Ricans and was spending the night on the bathroom floor. Dammit! I had to pee something fierce so I went into the back/side yard to my house to do my business.

I was a few seconds into my semi-public-pee-sesh when I saw, through the fence, a car pull up and park on the street...no problem, nobody can see me. Then I see a couple figures get out and walk towards the house...again, so long as nobody looks over the fence (and why would they do that??) I'm completely hidden from view. I turn my back to the street to finish my business when I hear, "Hey, what's going on here??" I quickly zip up and turn around to see two police officers leaning over the fence, looking at me take a wicked-pisser. I try to act normal and quickly change the subject. Are you two here for a 911 call? You are? Well, it's actually the neighbor that did it and he didn't even do it, really. It was the phantom phone that's the real culprit! etc. etc.

Not that it's a big deal to pee in a private, concealed back yard but doing just about anything with a police man watching makes me a little on-edge. Especially peeing.

Memorial Day Maintenance

noreply@blogger.com (Redfield) — Tue, 27 May 2008 04:40:00 +0000

Did more work on the website...particularly on the comics section. Check out the new buttons. : )

I called up Whiskey at around 11pm last night to talk comic but he was attending a social gathering at Crutchie's new apartment and was a little preoccupied. Here is a txt message I received from later that night:

dude im s9 driunk 8 cant wven see syraight. happy memoriall day. aaaaria! weeea 1 andale! ariba! vamanios!
12:53am

Best of luck to a speedy day-after recovery, WJ!

- Redfield

New Code, Old Content

noreply@blogger.com (Redfield) — Thu, 22 May 2008 09:10:00 +0000

I spent a few hours on the site tonight and got the new blog up and running! The format still needs some tweaking but I can work on that when it's not 2am. How do you folks like it? A little easier to read and a little cleaner looking, eh?

Still no new comics, but at least Stroke City is slowing entering the *new* world wide web. If Whiskey ever takes a break from attending concerts & indie-rock shows, maybe he'll tell us all what he's been up to. :)

- Redfield

Oh, By The Way...

noreply@blogger.com (Whiskey Johnson) — Tue, 20 May 2008 05:34:00 +0000

For Whiskey's 21st birthday I compiled the first year of Stroke City into a *very* professional comic book. It turns out that comic books actually take a long time to format and color so it took a couple years longer than I thought it would...but it's just on time for you folks, right? : ))

You can purchase the book here ---> Stroke City: Year One

I added a bunch of never-before-seen stuff and colored a number of the comics and, well, lets just say that it's definitely worth the price tag. : )

Check it out!

- Redfield

We're back! : P

noreply@blogger.com (Whiskey Johnson) — Tue, 20 May 2008 02:37:00 +0000

Hey guys! This might be the longest Stroke City has ever gone w/o an update...please, accept my apologies. Things might start back up in a bit because...

WHISKEY JOHNSON GRADUATED!!!

A big ol' congratulation to Whiskey for graduating this past Friday. Here are a couple choice txt messages I've received from him in the past week:

dude. just pulled a classic all-nighter. hows that for a finish?

so i did it, bro. all done. im graduamatated
:^)

So best of luck to Whiskey J. and best of luck to the (new) rebirth of Stroke City! I'll be graduating in a couple of months to follow suit. Just be sure to leave some Yukon Jack for me, WJ! : D

- Redfield

Back in Season:

noreply@blogger.com (Whiskey Johnson) — Tue, 22 Jan 2008 07:35:00 +0000

Wooo! So, I've been sick for a couple days and felt pretty crappy, the typical no energy, sleeping all the time type of stuff. But today was the first day I started feeling better and, despite the coughing and such, I felt really good. I dunno why I'm so excited. Could it be that I'm stoked about starting my last semester of college? That I can see the light at the end of the sewer tunnel?

Perhaps I'm excited because it's time to break out my "Budweiser Lizards Essay-Writing Whiskey Mixed-drinks Mug"? Nothing is soothing in quite the same fashion as pouring a nice double-shot of smooth and golden Yukon Jack into my mug and settling comfortably into my fake-leather office chair to pump out some academic wishitty-wash. Yeah, always a nice feeling.

Oh, right, I forgot!

I got pulled over tonight. I was pulling out of a Jack-in-the-Box drive thru and crossed some double yellows, debated going straight through a green light but changed my mind instead and drifted lazily into a left-turn lane. I watched in my rear-view mirror as a cop driving in the opposite direction flipped a u-turn, followed me through the left turn, and then turned on his lights and pulled me over to the side of the road.

Naturally, I was worried. The last cop I'd had to deal with was a total dick. But this cop was different: he didn't give me any shit, didn't play any weird guessing games. He was simply kind and straightforward. He said he'd pulled me over because my headlights were off. I told him I'd turned them off when I was in the Jack-in-the-Box drive-thru, and he nodded and said he does that too. He asked if I had any weed in the car, or if it was just the Jack-in-the-Box that he smelled, and I told him I didn't smoke. He smiled, checked my license and registration, then returned, told me to "Drive safe, Mr. *Johnson*" and to have a goodnight. The cop was courteous, understanding, and rational. Combining my two first-hand encounters with cops, I have now determined that only roughly %50 of cops are total dicks.

Thanks for not arresting me, Mr. Awesome Cop. : D

Sorry that this post is kinda random. I'm watching that awesome episode of SouthPark where they play cops and take down a bunch of drug lords.

Night folks! Have an awesome tomorrow!

=WJ=

(jeez, is awesome the word of the day or what? I'd better get a thesaurus...an awesome one)

And Now Another Opportunity For You To Learn From My Mistakes

noreply@blogger.com (Whiskey Johnson) — Fri, 28 Dec 2007 07:43:00 +0000

Hey guys...

Man, it has been a while since I have posted, so long in fact that I have forgotten the password to the site. I'd like to tell you a short semi-summary of a tale in the form of an advisory so that you may derive some kind of learning from the woeful puzzle that, jumbled, is my life.

Advice:

If you accidentally tell the girl you're dating that you're going to make an awesome Christmas present for her...

You had better deliver a fucking awesome present. That shit doesn't need to be better than an Astronaut's parade or anything, but it had best look like you spent some time on it. If you accidentally run out of time, and the gift you do end up giving her instead resembles something you could have easily picked up at a gas station (despite all the thought and effort you actually put into it), well...let's just say you won't necessarily have a girl to give a gift to when Valentine's Day rolls around (for some of you, this might actually be a relief!).

Lesson to be learned: Just don't tell your girl anything. Stay tight lipped and do nice things for her all the time as a surprise. No, she won't necessarily notice when you find tiny screws and use them to fix her broken sunglasses, or when you walk on the side of her that faces the street so that she'll never get splashed by passing cars, but at least when she dumps you for supposedly being thoughtless, you will know that you gave it your best. The world is a cold, dark place, and it hurts especially badly when one of those bright flames lighting up your life, which you've tried to shelter from so much exhausting unpleasantness, turns around and burns you (I was gonna finish up this previous sentence with something upbeat, but I can't think of anything at the moment. For any of you left out there who like to comment, why not try finishing it for me?)

I asked one of my managers today why she gets out of bed each morning. It took her a while to find answer, but in the end she decided that each day was valuable because it was another opportunity for her to try and be a better person. So I'll keep reaching for the stars (more like reaching for that ideal cookie jar on top of the fridge), and you can all learn from me which steps on the ladder are topple-safe and which ones are pivot-points of disaster.

Later kids! Happy Holidays!

-WJ

Sunday Night Throw Down!

noreply@blogger.com (Whiskey Johnson) — Mon, 17 Dec 2007 08:58:00 +0000

Hey dudes, Black Irish here (formerly known as "Redfield"...I've been renamed!) reporting on a night of fun provided by our favorite Jacks (Jukon Jack & Mr. Daniels). Here are a couple of pictures (I was the camera man so no pictures of me tonight!)

Double fisting

Whiskey Johnson & Boston having fun

We're on winter break now so keep checking back to the site for more updates (maybe even comic-related updates...!)

- Black Irish out

Comic for Sunday November 18th, 2007

noreply@blogger.com (Whiskey Johnson) — Mon, 19 Nov 2007 07:02:00 +0000

= Comic for Sunday November 18th, 2007 =

It's been awhile. Enjoy!

- Redfield

Are We Dead Or Are We Sleeping?

noreply@blogger.com (Whiskey Johnson) — Mon, 05 Nov 2007 09:00:00 +0000

Jeez, it's almost hard to believe it's been forever since a comic or a post. We had a comic waiting to go up, but who knows where that one is now. A lot has been going on recently. Mainly, I just got a job at a bookstore, and now my free time has been gobbled up. Not only that, but the new job has started to devour chunks of my academic time as well. Unfortunately, I'm liking work more than school these days. Having money is awesome.

Anyways, here are my thoughts on the comic and its future. We might turn the site into a dumping ground for random ideas. Believe it or not, we've been crafting the previous comics via extensive writing and drawing processes. Perhaps we will do away with such extravagances. Otherwise, we're just gonna have to wait until this semester is over to start delivering some well-thought-out comics again.

The site won't be entirely empty. We'll probably have a comic up sporadically every now and then. We just need some time to regroup and to perhaps develop a much more stream-lined updating system. The site is kinda composed of bits and pieces from what I understand, and perhaps we will need to make some changes with the site itself. Sorry bout all this info. You don't care about this stuff, do ya?

We'll send a comic your way soon. And expect a better site in all respects after December/January.

Later kids!

Hope you're all makin it through these crazy times alright!

=WJ=

Comic for Sunday October 14th, 2007

noreply@blogger.com (Whiskey Johnson) — Mon, 15 Oct 2007 04:23:00 +0000

= Comic for Sunday October 14th, 2007 =

As a sacrifice to the internet Gods, I offer a new comic. May the bandwidths swell and flow...

Sigh...

noreply@blogger.com (Whiskey Johnson) — Sun, 30 Sep 2007 20:24:00 +0000

We have a few comics waiting to be uploaded. They are in Redfield's possession. However, a string of unfortunate circumstances has prevented this, including Redfield's computer malfunctioning and then his dog becoming extremely sick.

I know we've taken longer breaks than this at the StrokeCity site, but it's still really annoying when we have comics just sitting around waiting to be uploaded and can't. Sure, I could color the comics myself and then have Redfield come over and show me how to upload everything yet again, but what, am I made of time or something? GEEZ! Quit smothering me! I'm going to Moe's.

Luckily, we've been generating a lot of ideas for comics. One (being me) can only hope that things clear up soon and we can get some comics up.

Can you all say, "Pleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeease Redfield"?

=WJ=

And the blame goes to...

noreply@blogger.com (Whiskey Johnson) — Tue, 18 Sep 2007 00:57:00 +0000

So, I'm sitting here trying to draw a comic when I hear the neighbor's little girls playing in their backyard. They're rattling off phrases like, "Oh, my Gawd," "Work it girl," and "Whatever!" I hope I don't need to explain why this is such a depressing thing. They don't talk like this all the time, so they're obviously not stupid, but I fear that after a few more years of social conditioning via the mass media and a lack of intervention from their parents, these girls will indeed grow up to be morons.

Another issue: Girls, are you out there all wearing deodorant? I'm all for equality and don't mean this an any sorta gender-biased way. I believe in cleanliness and good hygiene for both sexes, and even for transgender folk as well. But twice now I've been sitting in class next to some girl, and suddenly the stench of body odor wafts by (at first I thought it might be me, but nope, I just smell like Axe Phoenix). However, once these girls get up and leave the smell is gone, so I'm pretty sure it's them. The first time it happened, I thought it was just the one girl. Now, a second one has appeared in a different class on a different day with a similar odor-based affliction. What gives, Girlies?

Aw, Christ-mas! Now one of those neighbor girls is uttering, "Oh yeah, baby! Give it to me!" I really really hope they're just playing Christmas or Birthday or reenacting some other wholesome, traditional event that involves presents.

Sometimes I really hate this culture of ours.

-WJ

(We're supposed to put a comic up soon if only Redfield would come online and write one with me. He's supposed to go in for an opperation tomorrow, so I guess we should cut him some slack, but honestly, how many excuses has that guy got?)

Absence Defines Existence<=some postmodern BS

noreply@blogger.com (Whiskey Johnson) — Wed, 12 Sep 2007 00:41:00 +0000

Hey Kids!

So Redfield was called "back East" for the majority of the weekend to handle family matters. As I watched him pull his luggage from the trunk of my car at the Delta section of the airport, I was already aware that there would be no comic posting for the majority of the week.

However, there is a chance that we will have some fun stuff up by Friday/Saturday/Sunday-ish. Until Redfield's return, I'm content to let myself get bogged down with books and late assignments in the time-energy sink hole that has become my current academic career. It sucks. But I'm only a year away from freedom.

Oh, one cool thing! A group of fellow writing students from my CSUSM Lit department got together on Sunday at Tom Gibblins pub to discuss everything from writing to...well, literature. However, after a few whiskey-and-cokes for me and some lemon-drop martinis for the ladies, we were well on our way to simply ranting about the odd, eccentric, nerdy, or annoying folks we've had to put up with in class for the past 2-6 years. It felt really good to be part of a community, even if that community is really more of a mob purchasing pitchforks and lighting torches for some up-coming, impromptu celebration of bloody and unparalleled neurotic and antisocial--OOOO! I smell dinner!

Back later,

Maybe.

-WJ

(With a mouth full of food, "What? Oh yeah, sure sure! Burn it all down.")

WoRD JuMbLe!@#%&*!

noreply@blogger.com (Whiskey Johnson) — Thu, 06 Sep 2007 05:04:00 +0000

Man, I feel like a punching bag.

...if a punching bag was so tired of doing schoolwork that it lay around eating Tai food and watching the Simpsons. After this, I have 40 something pages of Wollstonecraft's A Vindication of the Rights of Woman to read. It ain't bad, but it's DENSE. That lady really knew how to pack it in good and tight.

The Office is so awkwardly funny, it pains me. Not new news or anything, but still the truth. My friend Crutchie and his woman Meggie invited me over to watch the 3rd season on dvd with them. Painful hilarity. (Oh shiz! We used to have Office watching Thursday mini-parties with Punz from MotA!)

Reflection of the week: It is hard when someone likes you and you think they're a great friend, but you just don't like them back. I know that sounds way high school and I should have learned how to cope with this type of situation a long time ago, but as Grandpa Simpson proved, it doesn't get easier just cause you're older.

I was gonna explain what led up to that reflection, but WTF am I doing? This is a comic site! We'll have more comic-like .jpgs up for you by the end of the week. Redfield just keeps gettin drunk, sorry, silly, with his MJ while I'm forced to do work. What the hell happened to the world? When did everything get all topsy-turvey and upside-down and inverted. Wait, do those two things together make it right side up again? Fukc you. Sorry, i'm tired. Did I mention that?

I might even get a job.

Imagine that.

That is...

INSANE!

^That's what Redfield has to deal with from me all the time. No wonder he drinks. YES, more content will be coming. NO, it won't suck as much as it has. MAYBE, I am lying cause I don't really know.

LATER

-WJ

(I want to have a Flamming Dr. Pepper too! : (