City News entry for Thursday, September 28th, 2006
Well, well, well…
Looks like this might be the latest post we’ve ever had, but in these times of great uncertainty, who’s to say? I can’t think of anything to say this post, so you’ll have to be satiated with that alone. Come back Monday and I might have an account of something great. You never know…
Later, Kids! Have a good Friday nite!
-The Whiskey M.C.
There Aren't a Whole Lot of Options
Well, well, well…
Looks like this might be the latest post we’ve ever had, but in these times of great uncertainty, who’s to say? I can’t think of anything to say this post, so you’ll have to be satiated with that alone. Come back Monday and I might have an account of something great. You never know…
Later, Kids! Have a good Friday nite!
-The Whiskey M.C.
City News entry for Wednesday, September 27th, 2006
Hey Kids,
Our garbage disposal here at the office has been broken for some time now. Usually it’s just filled with food junk like corn silks and such. However, today when I poked my hand into this mechanical mouth to withdraw its disgusting contents, I found a much more diverse assortment of chewed-up inedibles. Not only was there the expected potato skins and fruit mash, but bottle caps and bits of broken glass as well. I was surprised to say the least. Luckily, my drawing hand escaped unscathed. I should really start wearing some special hand-protecting device like David Duchovny’s character in Zoolander.
In short, the greatest loss was the Div shot glass from the Penny-Arcade store, which had been nearly vaporized within the disposal at some unconfirmed time. The greatest shame is that it wasn’t even ours! It was our departed friend Patrick’s! I hope he’s not reading this. I’d hate for him to hear it this way. Still, we might have enough in our Pennies for Parties jar to buy another one for him, though it will set us back a bit from our goal of Cookie Fiesta. (This was actually from an anecdote Patrick’s dad told him in which everyone would buy a different type of cookie, get baked, and then eat only cookies for the rest of the night. We are quite lucky to be the bearers of Patrick’s father’s great wisdom and we thank him very much for it!)
You might be wondering, “Did he just say Patrick is dead?” Okay, I sorta did imply that from my word choice. Actually, we can neither confirm nor deny this account. However, we might soon start carrying black Patrick arm bands and look for “Patrick is Dead” t-shirts in our store just as soon as Patrick gets around to coding it for us. Or doesn’t. He was always just skin and bones anyways.
I’m gonna go munch down some tacos and then it’s nothing but work, work, work. Got no time for sleep these days. What a shame.
Late nights and early rises, kids, and you’ll be dead soon too.
-The Whiskey
A Public Service Announcement
Hey Kids,
Our garbage disposal here at the office has been broken for some time now. Usually it’s just filled with food junk like corn silks and such. However, today when I poked my hand into this mechanical mouth to withdraw its disgusting contents, I found a much more diverse assortment of chewed-up inedibles. Not only was there the expected potato skins and fruit mash, but bottle caps and bits of broken glass as well. I was surprised to say the least. Luckily, my drawing hand escaped unscathed. I should really start wearing some special hand-protecting device like David Duchovny’s character in Zoolander.
In short, the greatest loss was the Div shot glass from the Penny-Arcade store, which had been nearly vaporized within the disposal at some unconfirmed time. The greatest shame is that it wasn’t even ours! It was our departed friend Patrick’s! I hope he’s not reading this. I’d hate for him to hear it this way. Still, we might have enough in our Pennies for Parties jar to buy another one for him, though it will set us back a bit from our goal of Cookie Fiesta. (This was actually from an anecdote Patrick’s dad told him in which everyone would buy a different type of cookie, get baked, and then eat only cookies for the rest of the night. We are quite lucky to be the bearers of Patrick’s father’s great wisdom and we thank him very much for it!)
You might be wondering, “Did he just say Patrick is dead?” Okay, I sorta did imply that from my word choice. Actually, we can neither confirm nor deny this account. However, we might soon start carrying black Patrick arm bands and look for “Patrick is Dead” t-shirts in our store just as soon as Patrick gets around to coding it for us. Or doesn’t. He was always just skin and bones anyways.
I’m gonna go munch down some tacos and then it’s nothing but work, work, work. Got no time for sleep these days. What a shame.
Late nights and early rises, kids, and you’ll be dead soon too.
-The Whiskey
City News entry for Monday, September 25th, 2006
Hey, Kids! Looks like we’ve survived another weekend. Absolutely nothing to report. Except that a bunch of us went to the Andrew Bird concert at the Belly Up. It was pretty cool, but the 21-and-up crowd is much too mellow for my taste. Sure, they clapped and whoo-ed when the song was over, but how about some dancing? Some foot-tapping, maybe? At least some swaying?!?! God, you guys suck! Move people, fucking move!!!
Two commercials have been bothering me recently. One is the Gap commercial where a bunch of trendy guys try and rescue a dog from a clothesline. No offense to marketing people (though they are God-awful people, mind you. Their careers are the work of Satan.) I like the story in the commercial. I dare say the entire thing is even “cute.” What I hate is the freeze-frame where the trendy kids float in mid-air grinning as the price flashes. It isn’t freakin DragonBall Z! You think it makes me happy to see a male model smiling mindlessly at me advertising clothes I neither want nor can afford when I’m just waiting for my freaking show to come back from commercial? I’m a guy. Show me the price and if I want it, I’ll buy it. None of this smooth-jazzing it up.
The other commercial I hate is an Old Navy commercial for skinny black pants. Actually, I like the commercial. It’s put together nicely and there’s some good motion graphics work going on there. I suppose what I hate is the idea that these pants are a means of expression. You want to express yourself through pants you JUST SAW in a TV advertisement? Perhaps you should take some time to think this through. I could understand making your own pants as a form of expression; I actually think that would be cool, but I wouldn’t recommend buying into the idea that these pants are freeing you up. The next ad should be for pants that free you up from the pants they’re advertising now. Maybe the “fat-white pants.” Anyone? No, I don’t think that would fly well. Guess that’s why I’m just a bitter alcoholic and not a marketing manager.
So, though we can’t protect the world, we’ll try and keep the City free of this type of corruption. Still, if offered even the smallest reasonable sum to sell out, would we crack? I have been wanting to get my Roller Blades fixed and Hot Pockets don’t buy themselves. Hm…we should change those to non-brand name items like “inline skates” and “micro-waveable pizza pockets.” Wouldn’t it be cool if they were called pizza rockets? They’d probably blow up in your micro-wave though. I can see I’m getting delirious. Time for my usual 4 hours of sleep.
Later, whiskey rhinos! That’s Winos, for short!
-WJ
(We should sponsor a boy-scout troup)
$49.50? OMGAWD!
Hey, Kids! Looks like we’ve survived another weekend. Absolutely nothing to report. Except that a bunch of us went to the Andrew Bird concert at the Belly Up. It was pretty cool, but the 21-and-up crowd is much too mellow for my taste. Sure, they clapped and whoo-ed when the song was over, but how about some dancing? Some foot-tapping, maybe? At least some swaying?!?! God, you guys suck! Move people, fucking move!!!
Two commercials have been bothering me recently. One is the Gap commercial where a bunch of trendy guys try and rescue a dog from a clothesline. No offense to marketing people (though they are God-awful people, mind you. Their careers are the work of Satan.) I like the story in the commercial. I dare say the entire thing is even “cute.” What I hate is the freeze-frame where the trendy kids float in mid-air grinning as the price flashes. It isn’t freakin DragonBall Z! You think it makes me happy to see a male model smiling mindlessly at me advertising clothes I neither want nor can afford when I’m just waiting for my freaking show to come back from commercial? I’m a guy. Show me the price and if I want it, I’ll buy it. None of this smooth-jazzing it up.
The other commercial I hate is an Old Navy commercial for skinny black pants. Actually, I like the commercial. It’s put together nicely and there’s some good motion graphics work going on there. I suppose what I hate is the idea that these pants are a means of expression. You want to express yourself through pants you JUST SAW in a TV advertisement? Perhaps you should take some time to think this through. I could understand making your own pants as a form of expression; I actually think that would be cool, but I wouldn’t recommend buying into the idea that these pants are freeing you up. The next ad should be for pants that free you up from the pants they’re advertising now. Maybe the “fat-white pants.” Anyone? No, I don’t think that would fly well. Guess that’s why I’m just a bitter alcoholic and not a marketing manager.
So, though we can’t protect the world, we’ll try and keep the City free of this type of corruption. Still, if offered even the smallest reasonable sum to sell out, would we crack? I have been wanting to get my Roller Blades fixed and Hot Pockets don’t buy themselves. Hm…we should change those to non-brand name items like “inline skates” and “micro-waveable pizza pockets.” Wouldn’t it be cool if they were called pizza rockets? They’d probably blow up in your micro-wave though. I can see I’m getting delirious. Time for my usual 4 hours of sleep.
Later, whiskey rhinos! That’s Winos, for short!
-WJ
(We should sponsor a boy-scout troup)
City News entry for Friday, September 22nd, 2006
Hey everyone! We made it through another week! Whoopee! Not much to report tonight. Redfield and I are working on a very simple advertisement to be posted with one of our good friends. That will help put one more link on the web to lead you back to us, in case you got lost or just plain silly.
Looks like Double D is back in school so the website’s completion may be indefinitely postponed. Then again, most of the work left to be done revolves around me. What have I been up to, you don’t ask? Watching Scrubs re-runs and the season premiere of The Office. I’m sure these shows have been promoted quiet decently on their own AND have had plenty of help from fans, but I have to admit here, publicly, that I find these shows both enjoyable and extremely humorous. If you’re not into this type of humor, at least you can top it all off with some Adult Swim before bed.
I was going to go buy the new Say Anything album because it looks (and sounds) like a decently original take on rock. Since I have not heard much of it, my comments may not be entirely reliable. However, I can say that from what I have heard, this band is definitely fun to listen to. Still, I am extremely short on cash and extremely maxed out on credit, so Redfield persuaded me not to purchase the album. “But it’s only on sale at Target for one more week!” I pleaded. “What the fuck do I care?” Redfield responded, “I fucking hate your guts!” “Quiet down a little and put those bottle shards away,” I calmly suggested. “No way man! I’m on the razor’s edge here! I’m pretty calm for a man who hasn’t gotten laid in months!” “Yeah, you really are,” I said, feeling equally on edge all of a sudden.
Okay, wait, back up. (Makes annoying rewinding sounds while doing the reverse robot.) Redfield and I didn’t say all that stuff, but he did tell me to wait until I had an income before making any more rash purchases. That’s sound advice you can’t charge to a card, my friends. Still, what remains for me? Is my future to work at Blockbuster for eternity? This City job doesn’t pay much, but it’s a lot better than explaining to customers why there’s a ‘surprise’ charge on their rental account OR telling them how corn grows. Take it from me, that sucks too!
So, until I get a new job, I’ll be spending the off hours studying or applying myself or working to make this City a better, more content-filled place. I might even stop buying alcohol in favor of art supplies and cheap, cheap tuna. It’s the poor man’s chicken! This is getting depressing. I’m going to bed.
-WJ
You know you’ve hit bottom when you’re making Sloppy Joes with some tuna you bought from the change you found in an old pair of jeans. Not that I have done that...yet.
Why I Hate Sub Way
Hey everyone! We made it through another week! Whoopee! Not much to report tonight. Redfield and I are working on a very simple advertisement to be posted with one of our good friends. That will help put one more link on the web to lead you back to us, in case you got lost or just plain silly.
Looks like Double D is back in school so the website’s completion may be indefinitely postponed. Then again, most of the work left to be done revolves around me. What have I been up to, you don’t ask? Watching Scrubs re-runs and the season premiere of The Office. I’m sure these shows have been promoted quiet decently on their own AND have had plenty of help from fans, but I have to admit here, publicly, that I find these shows both enjoyable and extremely humorous. If you’re not into this type of humor, at least you can top it all off with some Adult Swim before bed.
I was going to go buy the new Say Anything album because it looks (and sounds) like a decently original take on rock. Since I have not heard much of it, my comments may not be entirely reliable. However, I can say that from what I have heard, this band is definitely fun to listen to. Still, I am extremely short on cash and extremely maxed out on credit, so Redfield persuaded me not to purchase the album. “But it’s only on sale at Target for one more week!” I pleaded. “What the fuck do I care?” Redfield responded, “I fucking hate your guts!” “Quiet down a little and put those bottle shards away,” I calmly suggested. “No way man! I’m on the razor’s edge here! I’m pretty calm for a man who hasn’t gotten laid in months!” “Yeah, you really are,” I said, feeling equally on edge all of a sudden.
Okay, wait, back up. (Makes annoying rewinding sounds while doing the reverse robot.) Redfield and I didn’t say all that stuff, but he did tell me to wait until I had an income before making any more rash purchases. That’s sound advice you can’t charge to a card, my friends. Still, what remains for me? Is my future to work at Blockbuster for eternity? This City job doesn’t pay much, but it’s a lot better than explaining to customers why there’s a ‘surprise’ charge on their rental account OR telling them how corn grows. Take it from me, that sucks too!
So, until I get a new job, I’ll be spending the off hours studying or applying myself or working to make this City a better, more content-filled place. I might even stop buying alcohol in favor of art supplies and cheap, cheap tuna. It’s the poor man’s chicken! This is getting depressing. I’m going to bed.
-WJ
You know you’ve hit bottom when you’re making Sloppy Joes with some tuna you bought from the change you found in an old pair of jeans. Not that I have done that...yet.
City News entry for Wednesday, September 20th, 2006
Have you ever played Mexico? You know, the dice game? Well, I guess it’s also a drinking game. Have you ever played Kings? Well, I guess that can also be played as a drinking game. Have you ever played those two games back to back and regretted it the entire time? I wouldn’t blame you. I was playing with some friends, including both Double D and our friend Jooj from Mota, when I made THAT startling discovery.
We started out with a liar’s favorite, Ol’ Mexico. After everyone realized Mexico with half shots would take us south of the border a lot faster than intended, we switched to Kings. Here’s the thing...I dislike beer. A lot. I can hold it down, but hard alcohol is Whiskey’s drink of choice. However, last night, I took some Yukon Jack up the nose or something while shooting and when I opened my eyes I’d coughed it down my shirt and into my hands. After that, Redfield could barely take his shot without flinching. (Ask him to tell you the one about cough syrup and his wardrobe! I thought that one was pretty funny!)
Anyways, my disastrous shooting experience, combined with stuffing myself with Chili’s food just hours earlier, left me with little recourse other than to drink Heineken and feel miserable the rest of the night. Well, our friend Drew ended up outlawing both names and swears in the game, and he, Jooj and Nicky T all conspired to create a horrible drinking chain which resulted in my drinking an average of three drinks to everyone else’s one. By the time the game was over, everyone was thoroughly relieved and left to meander groggily to their rooms. I slept until 1:30 the next day.
I don’t think I ever truly woke up after that. I’m still a bit... bleary-eyed. Perhaps I should start investing in filters and ground coffee beans. Until then, an eye-opener before bed will have to do.
Enjoy the comic, folks! Goodnight!
-WJ
Space #1!
Have you ever played Mexico? You know, the dice game? Well, I guess it’s also a drinking game. Have you ever played Kings? Well, I guess that can also be played as a drinking game. Have you ever played those two games back to back and regretted it the entire time? I wouldn’t blame you. I was playing with some friends, including both Double D and our friend Jooj from Mota, when I made THAT startling discovery.
We started out with a liar’s favorite, Ol’ Mexico. After everyone realized Mexico with half shots would take us south of the border a lot faster than intended, we switched to Kings. Here’s the thing...I dislike beer. A lot. I can hold it down, but hard alcohol is Whiskey’s drink of choice. However, last night, I took some Yukon Jack up the nose or something while shooting and when I opened my eyes I’d coughed it down my shirt and into my hands. After that, Redfield could barely take his shot without flinching. (Ask him to tell you the one about cough syrup and his wardrobe! I thought that one was pretty funny!)
Anyways, my disastrous shooting experience, combined with stuffing myself with Chili’s food just hours earlier, left me with little recourse other than to drink Heineken and feel miserable the rest of the night. Well, our friend Drew ended up outlawing both names and swears in the game, and he, Jooj and Nicky T all conspired to create a horrible drinking chain which resulted in my drinking an average of three drinks to everyone else’s one. By the time the game was over, everyone was thoroughly relieved and left to meander groggily to their rooms. I slept until 1:30 the next day.
I don’t think I ever truly woke up after that. I’m still a bit... bleary-eyed. Perhaps I should start investing in filters and ground coffee beans. Until then, an eye-opener before bed will have to do.
Enjoy the comic, folks! Goodnight!
-WJ
City News entry for Monday, September 18th, 2006
In the marathon of debauchery that we call “running Stroke City”, we may have hit the wall. I don’t know how long I can go on in this mind drought. Where are my electrolytes of funny? Well, until I get my high-in-sodium sugar water, you guys can enjoy this next comic. We’re at lap 16 of some indefinitely long stretch.
This weekend involved a lot of moving and attempted reading. Now Redfield and I have offices right next to each other. There’s almost no reason to inner-office message explicit and vulgar things when we can just hand-deliver them! Well, when I can just hand-deliver them. Let the era of obscenity commence!
Tonight we say goodbye to our good housemate, Patrick. We’ll drink one in his honor! No, he’s not dead, he’s just not gonna be sharing workspace with us anymore. He might actually be around to drink with us, though! Hopefully he’ll be visiting! Here’s to you, good buddy, wherever you are, cause you’re sure not in this room right now. (Wipes away solitary tear) At least I hope you’re not in here...watchin with that freaky grin of yours.
Nothing else to report tonight. Hope all had a good weekend! We’ll see ya on Wednesday!
-WJ, Esq.
One Stroke Joke: Hang-kerchief!
In the marathon of debauchery that we call “running Stroke City”, we may have hit the wall. I don’t know how long I can go on in this mind drought. Where are my electrolytes of funny? Well, until I get my high-in-sodium sugar water, you guys can enjoy this next comic. We’re at lap 16 of some indefinitely long stretch.
This weekend involved a lot of moving and attempted reading. Now Redfield and I have offices right next to each other. There’s almost no reason to inner-office message explicit and vulgar things when we can just hand-deliver them! Well, when I can just hand-deliver them. Let the era of obscenity commence!
Tonight we say goodbye to our good housemate, Patrick. We’ll drink one in his honor! No, he’s not dead, he’s just not gonna be sharing workspace with us anymore. He might actually be around to drink with us, though! Hopefully he’ll be visiting! Here’s to you, good buddy, wherever you are, cause you’re sure not in this room right now. (Wipes away solitary tear) At least I hope you’re not in here...watchin with that freaky grin of yours.
Nothing else to report tonight. Hope all had a good weekend! We’ll see ya on Wednesday!
-WJ, Esq.
City News entry for Friday, September 15th, 2006
So, looks like some new people have been hitting the site. Not too bad for our third or fourth week. Nothing really big to report tonight. Our “State of the City” address is pretty short, so you guys only have to stand out there in the cold for a minute or two and then you can go back to your homes and watch your regularly scheduled programs! Man, I hate it when The Simpsons is supposed to be on, but instead it’s some presidential speech on EVERY CHANNEL! If I wanted to see the speech, I’d turn to a news channel, but if the networks are concerned about ratings and not losing viewers, they should show the freakin Simpsons! I’m sure there might be other factors in play here, but I don’t wanna listen to ‘em right now.
So, we played a wicked game of bowling with Double D’s gal pal from work. During the second game, they took the rest of us to the cleaners (figuratively, of course.) Still, Redfield has never met a girl he couldn’t beat and he broke her eventually. He can be pretty forceful sometimes and I’d be surprised if any girl could stand up to him. Am I still talking figuratively? (shrugs) It was a shallow, 1 point victory, but a victory none the less.
We all had a lot of fun and, after a long InnOut run, the rest of us returned home to nurse our varying scars and flesh wounds. If this is how we kick off a simple Thursday, I wonder what else is in store this weekend!
We have some ideas on the drawing board for the site, but we’ll wait until they’re more fleshed out. Feel free to send any comments in our direction using our “Contacts” page! By the way, if you’re from Justin’s MotA site, ask him for the “Mustached Whale” t-shirt! It’s probably one of my favorite MotA designs!
Well, I should rest up in preparation for recording tomorrow with our good friend Ian. Gotta fix the amp and tune the guitar! I might even get to hang with my best friend, Crutchie! Pizza, beer and Family Guy should be in order. Haven’t met Crutchie yet? You probably will...just check back with us sometime. So kiddos, get ready for a pretty sweet weekend!
Night y’all! Thanks for sparing a minute of your time to come see us! Happy Friday!
-Whiskey Johnson
Director of Tourism
One Stroke Joke: Doc's Orders
So, looks like some new people have been hitting the site. Not too bad for our third or fourth week. Nothing really big to report tonight. Our “State of the City” address is pretty short, so you guys only have to stand out there in the cold for a minute or two and then you can go back to your homes and watch your regularly scheduled programs! Man, I hate it when The Simpsons is supposed to be on, but instead it’s some presidential speech on EVERY CHANNEL! If I wanted to see the speech, I’d turn to a news channel, but if the networks are concerned about ratings and not losing viewers, they should show the freakin Simpsons! I’m sure there might be other factors in play here, but I don’t wanna listen to ‘em right now.
So, we played a wicked game of bowling with Double D’s gal pal from work. During the second game, they took the rest of us to the cleaners (figuratively, of course.) Still, Redfield has never met a girl he couldn’t beat and he broke her eventually. He can be pretty forceful sometimes and I’d be surprised if any girl could stand up to him. Am I still talking figuratively? (shrugs) It was a shallow, 1 point victory, but a victory none the less.
We all had a lot of fun and, after a long InnOut run, the rest of us returned home to nurse our varying scars and flesh wounds. If this is how we kick off a simple Thursday, I wonder what else is in store this weekend!
We have some ideas on the drawing board for the site, but we’ll wait until they’re more fleshed out. Feel free to send any comments in our direction using our “Contacts” page! By the way, if you’re from Justin’s MotA site, ask him for the “Mustached Whale” t-shirt! It’s probably one of my favorite MotA designs!
Well, I should rest up in preparation for recording tomorrow with our good friend Ian. Gotta fix the amp and tune the guitar! I might even get to hang with my best friend, Crutchie! Pizza, beer and Family Guy should be in order. Haven’t met Crutchie yet? You probably will...just check back with us sometime. So kiddos, get ready for a pretty sweet weekend!
Night y’all! Thanks for sparing a minute of your time to come see us! Happy Friday!
-Whiskey Johnson
Director of Tourism
City News entry for Wednesday, September 13th, 2006
If you missed it, as is likely you did, we put up a comic on Tuesday. However we did not actually get the comic up until 11:30 pm at night. What happened? Well, I’ll tell you, but I dunno why you’re getting so personal all of a sudden. I had the comic for Redfield to post, but he had not scanned it in yet so it sat on my desk all day. In Double D’s defense, he was nursing a sick dog. Then I got drunk last night with Justin from MotA, and our housemate Nicky T. and the noise of us getting our drunken asses kicked at Halo2 kept Redfield up all night. And then he got up before sunrise to go to work and didn’t get back ‘til late evening.
That’s Redfield. What was my excuse? I was slightly hung over all morning, though my head finally cleared up at around 7 this evening. I guess there’s a first for everything. Since I do not have the ability to work expensive photo-scanning equipment, I just whined to Redfield via text messages.
Also, that Tuesday comic was the first one colored digitally; a feat we are not likely to repeat any time soon.
We must give a “shout out” to our good friend, Kerry. You told people about us, Kerry, so we’re telling them about you! She recently turned 21 and likes the band “Brand New”. I don’t think she’d be opposed to movies and fancy dinners, either! We hope that you will continue to be a loyal reader, Kerry, in these times of great hardship! Speaking of which, we’re out of Yukon Jack. It was a sad day when we finally lost him! (Salutes).
One last thing! If you go down to our local City Chili’s restaurant, you might see my drawing of the house crew up on the wall. I donated a dollar to a charity for children with cancer (I think it was St. Jude’s) and in return they let me fill my time with coloring and my belly with turkey sandwich. Also, much thanks to our beautiful and charming waitress! She was from Texas! If not for her cute southern drawl, I never would have lost that dollar in a somewhat charitable fashion! I probably would have blown it on strippers or tipping the bartender at Dave and Busters.
So, the Wed. comic should be up by now. I hope you enjoy it!
I gotta take some pain pills and hit the hay, but we’ll continue to work hard and make this City the best damn city it can be! ...after we sleep...a lot.
To buds and suds! (but not bud’s suds!)
-Whiskey J.
It's Like A Kickstand
If you missed it, as is likely you did, we put up a comic on Tuesday. However we did not actually get the comic up until 11:30 pm at night. What happened? Well, I’ll tell you, but I dunno why you’re getting so personal all of a sudden. I had the comic for Redfield to post, but he had not scanned it in yet so it sat on my desk all day. In Double D’s defense, he was nursing a sick dog. Then I got drunk last night with Justin from MotA, and our housemate Nicky T. and the noise of us getting our drunken asses kicked at Halo2 kept Redfield up all night. And then he got up before sunrise to go to work and didn’t get back ‘til late evening.
That’s Redfield. What was my excuse? I was slightly hung over all morning, though my head finally cleared up at around 7 this evening. I guess there’s a first for everything. Since I do not have the ability to work expensive photo-scanning equipment, I just whined to Redfield via text messages.
Also, that Tuesday comic was the first one colored digitally; a feat we are not likely to repeat any time soon.
We must give a “shout out” to our good friend, Kerry. You told people about us, Kerry, so we’re telling them about you! She recently turned 21 and likes the band “Brand New”. I don’t think she’d be opposed to movies and fancy dinners, either! We hope that you will continue to be a loyal reader, Kerry, in these times of great hardship! Speaking of which, we’re out of Yukon Jack. It was a sad day when we finally lost him! (Salutes).
One last thing! If you go down to our local City Chili’s restaurant, you might see my drawing of the house crew up on the wall. I donated a dollar to a charity for children with cancer (I think it was St. Jude’s) and in return they let me fill my time with coloring and my belly with turkey sandwich. Also, much thanks to our beautiful and charming waitress! She was from Texas! If not for her cute southern drawl, I never would have lost that dollar in a somewhat charitable fashion! I probably would have blown it on strippers or tipping the bartender at Dave and Busters.
So, the Wed. comic should be up by now. I hope you enjoy it!
I gotta take some pain pills and hit the hay, but we’ll continue to work hard and make this City the best damn city it can be! ...after we sleep...a lot.
To buds and suds! (but not bud’s suds!)
-Whiskey J.
City News entry for Monday, September 11th, 2006
I really wish I could remember what the comic was for today, but I already turned it in. Oh good! Redfield already posted it! (On a side note, Redfield’s new nickname is “Double D.” Feel free to refer to him as such whenever you’d like.)
In City News, we might be trying something new tomorrow (Tuesday), so check back with us soon. It shouldn’t be anything radically different, but it might go a bit deeper than the normal jokes we pull out of the City sewers.
I think this is the first post I’ve done where I haven’t had alcohol within me in the past 24 hours. I dunno whether that is sad or momentous. Looks like I’m not the biggest drunk in the house (over-the-shoulder glance at housemate Jooj.) However, I do have pulsating back pain and will soon be consuming large handfuls of pain relievers.
If you didn’t know, we’re also looking for new roommates in this house, one room of which I occupy. Looks like we might have a tough choice between a cool artist dude from Japan and two European girls who want to share the room. At times like this, one must remember to make thoughtful adult decisions, not those filthy adult-section-of-your-local-video-store type decisions we’re used to making. Wish us luck!
Oh, by the way, we now have the “Contact” page up! Looks like we might be seeing some feedback eventually. Hope you guys are enjoying things! (Remember, we brought brownies and coffee for after the AA meeting in case you stick around for the discussion on “Comics: Their Relevance and Importance,” so don’t hate on us too much!)
As the pain shoots from the lower part of my spinal column, down through my legs, I realize I might be becoming a bit delirious. Goodnight and good day to you comic fans. Finish your nightcaps and find a safe ride home! We got work tomorrow!
-Whiskey
as I fall asleep singing…
(It’s always better on holiday. So much better on holiday. That’s why we only work when we need the money!-FF)
Indeed, Enough For Any Man
I really wish I could remember what the comic was for today, but I already turned it in. Oh good! Redfield already posted it! (On a side note, Redfield’s new nickname is “Double D.” Feel free to refer to him as such whenever you’d like.)
In City News, we might be trying something new tomorrow (Tuesday), so check back with us soon. It shouldn’t be anything radically different, but it might go a bit deeper than the normal jokes we pull out of the City sewers.
I think this is the first post I’ve done where I haven’t had alcohol within me in the past 24 hours. I dunno whether that is sad or momentous. Looks like I’m not the biggest drunk in the house (over-the-shoulder glance at housemate Jooj.) However, I do have pulsating back pain and will soon be consuming large handfuls of pain relievers.
If you didn’t know, we’re also looking for new roommates in this house, one room of which I occupy. Looks like we might have a tough choice between a cool artist dude from Japan and two European girls who want to share the room. At times like this, one must remember to make thoughtful adult decisions, not those filthy adult-section-of-your-local-video-store type decisions we’re used to making. Wish us luck!
Oh, by the way, we now have the “Contact” page up! Looks like we might be seeing some feedback eventually. Hope you guys are enjoying things! (Remember, we brought brownies and coffee for after the AA meeting in case you stick around for the discussion on “Comics: Their Relevance and Importance,” so don’t hate on us too much!)
As the pain shoots from the lower part of my spinal column, down through my legs, I realize I might be becoming a bit delirious. Goodnight and good day to you comic fans. Finish your nightcaps and find a safe ride home! We got work tomorrow!
-Whiskey
as I fall asleep singing…
(It’s always better on holiday. So much better on holiday. That’s why we only work when we need the money!-FF)
City News entry for Friday, September 8th, 2006
If any of you guys are returning visitors, we appreciate your patience as we work the kinks out of this knotted mass we call a website. If you’re not…why? Is it our hair? Our beautiful, wild hair? Or maybe you just don’t like uni-brows! You want some sort of conformist bullshit bi-brow? Well, lemme tell you you’re lucky we don’t just grow our hair in rings around our heads or then you’d really be puking.
Of course, I’m getting off topic. Today wraps up our “week” of “random” “comics”. Hope you guys enjoyed them. Perhaps Moose and Jeremy will be back with fantastic stories and continuing adventures…and maybe some cheesy bread while they’re at it. YEAH, some cheesy bread! That would be good! Anyone wonder what happened to Ron?
No?
Well, that’s about it. Once I stamp, seal and mail this baby, it will be on its way to our massive printing station in Hardforked, Road Island. And in two to three weeks, you’ll have your post!
Now it’s time to settle down with the remains of my party whiskey and a good George R. R. Martin book.
This one is for Bran and Rickon!
Sincerely,
The 100 Proof Lover,
-Whiskey J.
One Stroke Joke: Dreadful Nimbus
Between Redfield and I, it is hard to tell who is lazier. On the other hand, I am. Redfield’s been asking me to do the post for about an hour now, but I hardly had the Irish-Car-Bomb settled in my stomach before he wanted me to move couches too. Is there nothing that guy doesn’t want from me? This is why I don’t walk around naked anymore. Well, that and a court order. Anyways, Redfield will get his post right after I write it up and send it to him.If any of you guys are returning visitors, we appreciate your patience as we work the kinks out of this knotted mass we call a website. If you’re not…why? Is it our hair? Our beautiful, wild hair? Or maybe you just don’t like uni-brows! You want some sort of conformist bullshit bi-brow? Well, lemme tell you you’re lucky we don’t just grow our hair in rings around our heads or then you’d really be puking.
Of course, I’m getting off topic. Today wraps up our “week” of “random” “comics”. Hope you guys enjoyed them. Perhaps Moose and Jeremy will be back with fantastic stories and continuing adventures…and maybe some cheesy bread while they’re at it. YEAH, some cheesy bread! That would be good! Anyone wonder what happened to Ron?
No?
Well, that’s about it. Once I stamp, seal and mail this baby, it will be on its way to our massive printing station in Hardforked, Road Island. And in two to three weeks, you’ll have your post!
Now it’s time to settle down with the remains of my party whiskey and a good George R. R. Martin book.
This one is for Bran and Rickon!
Sincerely,
The 100 Proof Lover,
-Whiskey J.
City News entry for Wednesday, September 6th, 2006
Redfield might have some pics of us at the game, though I look bad from every angle. Redfiled also likes to blindside people, though his preferred method is the flashbulb. I was pretty toned down since Redfield wouldn’t let me drink. I ended up having to drive part of the way. : (
Next time we’ll try and drag Justin from MotA with us and he and I can paint some random letters on our chests! Justin’s letter will ripple majestically while mine will jiggle like gelatin on a trampoline.
As for a comic, we’re continuing our week of new and varying adventures that have no connection to each other whatsoever. I’d suggest you let us know what you think, but our “contact” button is just painted on, as well as two thirds of the buttons up there.
Hope everyone has a great week! We here in the City are excited and exhausted! Time to go home with someone beer-pretty!
-Bar closed-
-Whiskey J.
(oh yeah, hobos and reggae voodoo doctors on trolleys rock!)
Comic #10!! Woooooh!!1@!~!
The baseball game was super fun. Biiiiig thanks to Marj & Pat for the invites! Here are some pictures:
In site related news, I recently uploaded the archives page and will hopefully get around to coding the contact page and a way to view old news posts in the soon mode. As for the other links, we don't have any content for 'em yet so......stay tuned! : )
We're on the Web Comics List now so if you're a member and like our comic, add us to your favorites! Also, if you chuckled at a comic send it to a friend or somethin'. Whiskey has been on my case about Stroke City's low "tourism revenues"...and he's a violent drunk.
- Redfield
One Stroke Joke: Always Works For Me...
Tonight, Redfield and I hit up the Padres game with Patrick, web master for Masters of the Art, and his beautiful and always unexpectedly humorous girlfriend, Marj! Seriously, the girl just blindsides you with funny. I forgot how much I enjoyed baseball games; the open air, the dirty, greasy mobile food, and the streams of obscenities I can scream out that get lost in the crowd noise, not to mention the excitement and enthusiasm of everyone there. The Padres beat the Rockies by 1, though the way I tell it, the Rockies had to run off the field before being beaten to a state of near-death. In actuality, both teams succeeded in making the night enjoyable and entertaining. Great game, boys! Gotta tell my grandpa, the old Rockies fan, about how we totally whooped ‘em!Redfield might have some pics of us at the game, though I look bad from every angle. Redfiled also likes to blindside people, though his preferred method is the flashbulb. I was pretty toned down since Redfield wouldn’t let me drink. I ended up having to drive part of the way. : (
Next time we’ll try and drag Justin from MotA with us and he and I can paint some random letters on our chests! Justin’s letter will ripple majestically while mine will jiggle like gelatin on a trampoline.
As for a comic, we’re continuing our week of new and varying adventures that have no connection to each other whatsoever. I’d suggest you let us know what you think, but our “contact” button is just painted on, as well as two thirds of the buttons up there.
Hope everyone has a great week! We here in the City are excited and exhausted! Time to go home with someone beer-pretty!
-Bar closed-
-Whiskey J.
(oh yeah, hobos and reggae voodoo doctors on trolleys rock!)
|
The baseball game was super fun. Biiiiig thanks to Marj & Pat for the invites! Here are some pictures:
In site related news, I recently uploaded the archives page and will hopefully get around to coding the contact page and a way to view old news posts in the soon mode. As for the other links, we don't have any content for 'em yet so......stay tuned! : )
We're on the Web Comics List now so if you're a member and like our comic, add us to your favorites! Also, if you chuckled at a comic send it to a friend or somethin'. Whiskey has been on my case about Stroke City's low "tourism revenues"...and he's a violent drunk.
- Redfield
City News entry for Monday, September 4th, 2006
I can’t get Ben Fold’s “Army” song out of my head. It’s one of my favorites. But enough about me; we’ve got semi-relevant City news to talk about. If I’m remembering correctly, this week kicks off a new batch of comics. We’ll be mixing up this pudding, getting it all sweet and swirlie for your speedy consumption. It’s lip-licking good fun. Argh, I just felt the whiskey in my stomach turn.
Anyways, hope you guys enjoy whatever comic Redfield puts up. He and I should really start communicating better about these things.
Back later! Save me a drink!
-Whiskey
One Stroke Joke: SHEILA!
Well, it’s past time for the post. It’s late. Redfield’s already unconscious. I haven’t even finished my glass of Yukon Jack yet. The stuff is a lot harder to drink when not shooting it. Just smelling it makes me want to cough. Redfield’s lady friend even commented that she could smell it from across the room. That’s 100 proof for ya, I guess.I can’t get Ben Fold’s “Army” song out of my head. It’s one of my favorites. But enough about me; we’ve got semi-relevant City news to talk about. If I’m remembering correctly, this week kicks off a new batch of comics. We’ll be mixing up this pudding, getting it all sweet and swirlie for your speedy consumption. It’s lip-licking good fun. Argh, I just felt the whiskey in my stomach turn.
Anyways, hope you guys enjoy whatever comic Redfield puts up. He and I should really start communicating better about these things.
Back later! Save me a drink!
-Whiskey
City News entry for Friday, September 1st, 2006
So come back soon before we have to liquidate our assets and run off with our secretaries and annual payrolls! (P.S. I think Redfield’s secretary is a dog! Literally. He’s a boxer named CUUUUU-TAAAR!) Maybe we can get some links working around here or at least fix the espresso machine.
Sadly sober,
-Mr. McWhiskey
Martyred For Funny
I think the City’s 1-week-a-versary passed this Wednesday and celebrations were essentially invisible to the point of being non-existent. Perhaps tonight will afford more of a reason to celebrate seeing as it’s Friday! Yay! Normally this would mean a much-needed break for all of our hardworking staff over here in the City. However, you and I both know that sentence is 90% bullshit. We have just gotten lazier and lazier in the short amount of time that we’ve been exposed to the public. Pretty soon they’ll have reason to indict us.So come back soon before we have to liquidate our assets and run off with our secretaries and annual payrolls! (P.S. I think Redfield’s secretary is a dog! Literally. He’s a boxer named CUUUUU-TAAAR!) Maybe we can get some links working around here or at least fix the espresso machine.
Sadly sober,
-Mr. McWhiskey
